The Secret is Out:

There is a stranger within our midst. Monchichiland has its first estrangero. Munkima found him rummaging in the bin behind the Red Cross shop, and felt sorry for him. Recognising that he bore a passing resemblance to Monkee Maker's creations, she brought him home, but wasn't sure what Bossman's reaction might be (dyed in the wool racist that he is) so she installed him in the potting shed and put Ruby Lou and the Ninfant in charge of his comfort and education. He was very quick to learn, and soon let them know that he required chocolate in any form, and plenty of beer; preferably not the weak stuff from Lidl he said...Once I had twigged what was going on, I had him brought up to the house and told him he could stay for a while, on probation, but he had better get used to Lidl beer, because the rest of the family get legless on gnat's pee.

As you can see, he has fitted in quite well. He is beginning to open up a little about his reasons for leaving his homeland. It seems his main reason is that he just didn't fit in. He is sure he was adopted as a baby. His mother called him PG, but in his heart he knows he is really Earl Grey. "So what should we call you then?" I asked. He considered for 10 seconds; "My Lord....?"



I'm not sure if "Get stuffed" is an insult where he comes from, but he got the message, and we came to a compromise. We shall refer to him as "EG". It seems he likes to have his photograph taken with celebrities. We don't have many of those on this particular Costa, so he settled for a snap taken with the Blues Brothers before they left for their new home down on the beach.

Down in the garden, something stirred.....the flowers of the Aechmea fasciata have pushed their way out of their green leaf bracts and are standing proud.

Griller decided he needed a little jungle time....I don't think he realises that this plant comes from the jungles of Brazil and not from Africa.....but then he is only a Ninfant Griller.

I did some grown-up things today. Bossman received a letter from his pension company explaining why they had started deducting tax from his pittance. He hadn't even noticed that they had. £16 is easily missed when the amount that arrives in Euros changes from month to month. I spoke to a pleasant, helpful lassie who passed me on to an equally pleasant laddie (guess who the pension company is) and he explained that they had to deduct the tax until they received a new exemption certificate from the IR to replace the old one that was made redundant by the new legislation that came in last month.....He didn't seem at all surprised when I told him that I had filled in the form the IR sent back in June, but thought I should check with them that they had received it, and were not just snowed under with work. He even went so far as to give me the number he used to speak with the horses mouth in the right department. I tried the number three times, twice getting cut off halfway through the if you want...press ...spiel, and the third time got a long-winded recorded message telling me all the lines were busy, to call back later. At that rate it would be cheaper to pay the tax than the overseas call rate. I decided to have a look on the .gov website FAQs. I couldn't find anything relevant, but there was a little button inviting me to "ask Robin", so I did. Within 10 minutes I had a reply from Robin, who after extracting all relevant information in the course of 3 or 4 emails, has promised to send it all to the "annuities team in Leicester" and will "get back to me in due course". We shall see...